As a new mom, you might be asking this question after giving birth: Why don’t I love my child? The numbers show that 70 to 80% of new moms feel the baby blues – feelings of sadness and mood swings. Also, if these feelings are not dealt with they might develop into postpartum depression. Moreover, the new mom might show less motherly emotions towards the baby.
However, don’t let this overwhelm you! The good news is that some new mothers get passed these baby blues after a week or 2 post-delivery.
Unrealistic Expectations
The idea that a mother falls in love with her baby the second she lays eyes on him/her is very common. Also, a mother is expected to fall in love with her baby at first sight. But not all women feel that way, because every mother is different and may respond to motherhood differently.
While advice on how to be during and after pregnancy can be helpful, but sometimes the advice can overwhelm a first-time mom. Expectant mothers are often told that they will feel an all-consuming emotion and a love so great for their child that they’ll forget the world. As a result, the mother-to-be feels she has to reach these unrealistic expectations.
Lack of Motherly Emotions
During labor, a woman’s body releases endorphins to deal with the intense pain of childbirth. Once it’s over, the level of the soothing chemicals drops, taking away the excitement and euphoria of becoming a mother.
While it is a common scenario among many new moms, it may not be the case for every mother. Some women may instantly fall in love with their babies even after the endorphins wear off.
There is no right or wrong way of bonding with your child. You may bond with your little bundle of joy the minute you hold them, or you may take a while to form a connection with them. Just as your body takes a while to get back to its normal state, your emotions can also take a while to become how they are supposed to be.
3 Ways To Bond With Your Baby
As we talked about previously, new moms can start developing an intense feeling of love for their babies at different intervals. Whether you felt love at first at sight of seeing your baby or later on, we have listed 3 ways that can help you strengthen your baby bond:
1. Skin to skin contact
After breastfeeding, let your baby stay close to you. This will make him/her feel safe and loved. It will also help you develop more feelings of care and affection.
2. Make eye contact
Looking at your newborn and maintaining at least 1 second eye contact, can increase communication later on.
3. Develop a special routine
For instance, singing a special song during diaper change. Choose a special habit that you always share with your baby.
To Wrap Up
Remember, the next time you ask yourself why don’t I love my child, think that this doesn’t make you a bad mom. On the contrary, it’s a natural phase you’re passing through. Once you adapt to this new change, your bonding with your baby will get better.
Don’t Miss Out!
Taking care of yourself after birth is important for your physical and mental well being. Read our blog for more tips!
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